Mind Games...

I have always been hard on myself. I have, for the most part, felt like I was "average" when it came to certain things. One of these being competing.

I am making the following statement without a shred of cockiness (I am merely stating facts) - I have done very well during my last 3 years on stage. I have won my class twice, one overall win, and seven top five placings. However, I still feel like an underdog. Like I'm not quite at the level I need to be in order to be a contender. Like I'm average. Like I have more weaknesses versus strengths in terms of my physique.

In my "More Than A Month!?!?" post I mentioned that during this off-season, I am working on, not only my physical well-being, but my mental well-being as well. During one of my earlier text exchanges with the Boss Lady, she told me "A healthy mind leads the way". She and I have discussed on numerous occasions how I tend to let my negative, self-deprecating thoughts take over and cloud my vision. The Boss Lady explained to me that in order to be my best self, I had to start working on changing my mindset and clear my head of negative thoughts.


I decided that I wanted to read a book that could help me figure out why I tend to be so critical of myself. Why to I get in my own way when it comes to making goals and pursuing them.

I found this book while searching my library's catalog and at first I was going to pass on it because it was only available in audiobook format. Then I decided that I would check it out and I would listen to it to and from the gym. It turned out to be a great decision.

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One it helped me wake up and get ready for my workout. Two it helped me really think about what was going on in my life, the decisions I've made, the chances I have & haven't taken, etc. I now joke that I worship at the Church of Jen Sincero. She has really changed my life. This book is definitely librarian approved - read/listen to it if you can!!

Awhile back, Tom found this incredible video on youtube and played it for me. I instantly fell in love with it and told him I wanted to figure out a way to put it on my workout playlist. The man worked his magic and converted it, along with a couple of other videos, into mp3 files that I could add to my playlists.

And one of my all-time favorites:

 

One of the men that you hear speaking in the first two videos is Eric Thomas aka ET. The man is incredible. I feel like every time I listen to him, I can conquer the world. I downloaded his app and listen to him constantly.

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He really makes me want to do better - train harder - fight for more - aspire to be greater. His words breathe life into me every time I hear them.

I am learning how important it is to fill my heart and my mind with positive thoughts and people. While it may seem weird to others, this is what is working for me. This is what is helping me realize, like Jen says, that I am the only Tenecia there will ever be....and that I'm kind of a big deal. I get to perceive my reality so why would I choose to perceive myself as anything other than a super huge rock star of a person?

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